My Hiatus

I've lost my camera, so I don't have any pics to post right now, but I am pretty much back from my hiatus.  I found out I was pregnant and after you find out you're pregnant, but aren't ready to announce it- that is pretty much all that's on your mind: hence my not writing anything at all.  I am going to be 15 weeks on Thursday, so am over my hump-that's good.  i am still not "out of the woods" yet, however.  This pregnancy has experienced cramping and then the usual morning sickness and difficulty during the time I have to be on my meds (make me tired and dizzy), but I also have a subchorionic hematoma.  In Layman's terms- I have a hole where my uterus/placenta has pulled away from the uterine wall.  It puts me at a higher danger for miscarriage and I seem to be going between bedrest and semi-bedrest until this things resolves itself and it may or may not.  I have no doubt that we'll have this baby; I just don't know when (full term?) and how painful/inconvenient/scary/frustrating the rest of this pregnancy will be.  It is hard to take it easy and not lift up the kids to much and not do much housework, but I'm trying to be very good about listening to my body.  My husband is also my own personal superman, having picked up the slack like a pro (as much as he can, we still have crazy laundry and the house is in disarray).  He has been cooking and lifting and feeding and changing and bathing everyone so I don't have to do it, and that is so nice.  Some girlfriends have been so awesome to take the kids a few days so I could rest and some have come over while gary is in school, brought me snacks (they were so good:  reese's puffs, sweedish fish, gum, sourpatch kids, grapes and this morning greek food!), and my mom has been able to come up to help at night while gary is in school.  It has been so much help, and this just all started on the 18th.
We had to go to the emergency room because I thought I was miscarrying.  There was so much blood and cramping and the like.  After 7 hours in the emergency- baby was fine with heartbeat and movement and I was on bedrest for about a week.  We had a repeat occurrence on March 29th with the same amounts of blood and cramping, and 6 hours at ER with baby still doing okay and me on bedrest again.  It seems like it takes about 5 days for all the pain and bleeding stuff to subside and then I get to be on semi-bedrest.  This last episode was more painful than the first complete with labor pains around 3am the next night.  I hope that doesn't mean it will keep up that pattern.  My OB told me I can "putter" around and try not to be lifting.  He knows I have 3 kids and b/c of them a complete bedrest is pretty much impossible.  He also said that I may keep having episodes or it may resolve on its own.  Wait and See. Wait and See.
Throughout this ordeal everyone keeps telling me that there is nothing to be done to prevent a miscarriage or fix anything, and that it is all "wait and see."  After prayer and blessings, I feel confident of our having this baby, but I truly think this next 6 months is going to be very long.

On a lighter note (HA), I didn't lose the last 20 lbs from last pregnancy but I've only gained about 2 lbs this pregnancy (which counts as 22 in my book).  I'm trying to maybe gain less than 20 since I'm starting out heavier.  I view this as a pipe dream however, because the majority of my pregnancy will be in the summer, and I tend to take on water weight and swell when it's hot.  I think that by September 30th, I will be a very fat, swollen, uncomfortable, yet still happily pregnant woman.  We are anticipating being induced because I don't want to take a chance on having to have a natural childbirth again.  My last labor was about 2 hours from 1st cramp to baby in arms, and I'm afraid if we go into labor by ourselves it will be too quick for me to get drugs.  I really really need drugs.  Last time was a nightmare that I still cringe over.....